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The shadows of our love (ten years of loving you).
Exactly ten years ago today, I wrote this in my journal:"I feel like "he" is on his way to me. What a strange thing to say, even write down. But I know it. So I'm praying for you. For us. I know you'll...
View ArticlePrayerful.
I have been thinking on my prayer life lately. Like, literally, the prayers I've been praying my entire life. I even found my first journal. I was 8 when I started writing, which naturally means my...
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A reunion.
It was my wedding day. Amidst the excitement of what that day held for Luke and I, there was something else incredibly special happening in the chapel. It had been twelve years since I had seen them....
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For my Dad.
I was 10. Without going into extreme detail, this particular year of my life was one of the most pivotal. I recall so many days...hours...minutes...from this season vividly. Fear was prevalent and...
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Walk with you.
Have you ever stood in an incredibly long line? Or been to the DMV where you sit and watch an old lady knit an entire scarf while you wait for her number to be called? She's number 12...and you're...
View ArticleStockholm Syndrome
I was 4, and my Mom was really sick. I remember feeling scared when she would sit at the table with dozens of pills, a plate full of {only} protein, her head in her hands. I remember her praying...
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Pain with Purpose: beauty from ashes.
We have all had our own experiences with both the church and with Christians, and if you're like me, there have been good seasons, valuable relationships, and even spiritual growth directly related to...
View ArticleI digress.
For months, I've debated shutting the ole' Facebook down. Frankly, it's just become such a distraction. One more thing to keep up with, & check in on. It appeared as though these "relationships"...
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Heroes and Hallow Men
Today, on Veteran's Day, I am talking about my soldier. His pain became mine, and nearly destroyed our marriage. It wasn't an easy piece to articulate, but my hope is that someone out there can relate,...
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Paper Bags & Shopping Carts: what love looks like.
"Who do you know that you think acts the way Jesus tells us to?" I asked."What do you mean, Mom?""Who do you know that is giving and loving?"(Smiles)..."Mister Gonza."It was five years ago, and I was...
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Serendipity.
It was our first unofficial date, ten and a half years ago...(Who's this classy stud?!)We watched Serendipity on my couch and held fingers "accidentally" while watching John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale...
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2014.
Two days of migraines and nausea for me (including a possible neurological consult in the near future) & a serious bout of the flu for both boys. Yowza.Just now, Asher (sick as a dog) stroked my...
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Down in the river: A little something for the weary ones
I was in a service recently where “Down in the River” was sung a capella. My four-year-old sat on my lap as we sang the old hymn together. I rocked him side to side and closed my eyes. As soon as I...
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Cloud 9 Christianity
"When I was younger, I used to think Catholics were going to hell.""Yeah, me too.""Like, if someone wasn't an evangelical Christian who had been slain in the spirit and regularly spoke in tongues, they...
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Healing by way of being heard.
Sometimes we have a problem naming abuse for what it is.Maybe you have been hurt just like me. Maybe you too were a victim of abuse within a church. The saddest truth to me is that I know I'm not the...
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When love sees.
"Why is that man holding a sign, Momma?""Well, the sign says, "Homeless. Hungry. Any help appreciated.""Do we have money Mom?""I don't have any with me.""Well then, let's go get some!""You want to help...
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When we were free.
**disclaimer: this post refers to war and to suicide**The expectation of hope and freedom is sometimes all we have. It was for us, and for a sobering amount of time. He promised, "Someday, darling......
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The power of our voice: On motherhood
It was our first night together, just me and my first born son.Behind me was a thirty-six hour labor, which can only be explained as a holy expression of the depths of my soul (and pain). Ten months...
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Faith at the Fork in the Road
Speaking up for what we believe to be right (and not just on the internet, y'all) has resulted in much backlash in our family's relationships with Christian friends and family. We are called lots of...
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Asher's story.
My feet touch the floor. I am carrying you, sweet boy. Just two months into this pregnancy and we practically sleep on the bathroom floor. Sick and excited, we rarely walk. We rest, mostly. My feet...
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